Shaman Healer of the Lame Caribou Clan (After years of research, French anthropologists have managed to translate the famous cave paintings of Lascaux. The full translation will appear in next month’s “Journal of Linguistic Anthropology” but I thought I’d publish a sneak preview. -PB) Me. Tharg. Shaman Healer of the Lame Caribou clan. Master of […]

Actual Evaluation by My Residents and Attendings (Just for old time’s sake I reviewed my Dean’s letter. Man, those were the days! -PB) OB/Gyn: Student is on time and does everything asked of him willingly and with good humor but seemed uninterested in assisting in any more vaginal deliveries than were required to pass the […]

Back to the Future “So you want to hear how your old Grandpa lost his leg do you? I know what you’re thinking and no, I didn’t lose it in the Burger Wars. You’ve seen my old uniform hanging in the closet but by the time I enlisted…oh..had to have been the Summer of 2057… […]

My Better Half (Every guy has one great love. A woman who sets his heart beating by her beauty, her wit, and her charm. She doesn’t have to be Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm but some combination of her looks and personality strikes you like a thunderbolt the first time you meet her. Unfortunately, not every […]

Hey Panda. I’m a PA and I don’t like you much even though I inflict your blog on myself religiously. What do you think about Physician Assistants and Nurse Practitioners taking over from doctors? They might even replace you, Mister Emergency-Medicine-Smarty-Panda-Pants. Another excellent question and a source of great angst among those who are contemplating […]

Hey, Panda, what’s up with Physician Assistants? There are a bunch of them rotating with me and they say that they are just as well trained as doctors and can make more money. To tell you the truth, they are kind of a pain in the ass. Excellent question. For those of you who don’t […]

Half-Measures ( Disclaimer: Those of you with weak stomachs or who are excessively idealistic may skip this article in which I describe how one may subvert the conventional wisdom and get accepted to medical school. As you know, I believe the medical school admission process is idiotic. It encourages self-aggrandizement and has more hoops to […]

Was it That Long Ago? It was one of those cool, clean April mornings in North Carolina when I was discharged from the Marines. The sun shone brightly in the clear sky as the last of the mist lingering in the shadows evaporated. A gentle wind ruffled the surface of the New River and tugged […]

Random Musings on the New Year The years roll by. I have vague memories of time passing with glacial slowness. Waiting for summer vacation. The eternity of high school. The time when it seemed that I had alway been in boot camp and always would be. The months I counted during the first Gulf War […]